16. Self-Deprecating Danny

16

In 16th place… Self-Deprecating Danny.

When the internet is your venue for meeting people, you get to be anyone you want to be. You set the stage for who you are and what you want to attract neatly wrapped up in a nice little bow. The online profile through which you market yourself is the place to put your best foot forward.

But… unfortunately, not all users understand what is the best way to portray their personalities. Some things for me can be major turn-offs. For example, describing everything you don’t want in a partner publicly on your profile says, “I’m a negative person and I will find ways to be critical of you.” Or posting mostly photos of you cuddled up to various women says, “I want to have my cake and eat it too.”

On Tinder you can tell if someone has “super liked” your profile before making any decisions. It’s a tool Tinder created as a means to pull someone back into the terrifying void of swiping, mostly. But, this feature can be incredibly helpful. Many “super likers” are blatantly weird. Easy to say no. Sometimes, though, I give people the benefit of the doubt when looking at their profiles. Maybe marketing and branding just aren’t their fortes. So occasionally I will overlook the red flags and swipe right just to see what happens. Ignoring small details on a profile happens most often when the party in question has already expressed interest and I don’t have a huge reason to reject.

[Enter Danny].

Danny extended the “super like” gesture. I perused the profile and only saw the above mentioned profile qualms. His profile gave off a negative vibe by describing what his partner should not be. And he had multiple pictures with female friends. All in all, not the biggest reasons to reject someone before giving them a chance. So I said yes.

self-deprecating danny

Oh Danny… Not your best opening line at all.

You get to be anything you want to be! You can display the utmost confidence upon meeting someone because you don’t have to conduct the interaction face-to-face! And yet, his first point of contact was to inform me that nobody likes him. The lack of confidence is underwhelming to say the least.

The rest of the interaction was him asking me questions on how he should modify his online dating interactions. I also gave him some tips for his profile to potentially draw in a larger audience. (He vehemently defended his profile and rejected all forms of constructive criticism I offered, by the way).

When he asked me out, I made it very clear that I was not interested–though I thought the feedback and dating coaching should have been clear already.

Up next… 15th place.